September 2012 recap

Probably not going to have time to talk about September for the week anyways. So far life in the East is not bad. Used to the things going on. So far grades are not TOO bad. I got A's and B's hopefully no C's. It's a big improvement from undergrad SMH.

Well got to keep it up for another week! Then I will relax and have some fun hopefully. Well lets talk about money.

Currently I have categorized my spending and my goal is hopefully stick to it and save somewhere? I will try harder to get to where I need to be!

$1000 monthly breakdown

Food (Groceries) $100

Clothing- $90

Dining- $40

House -$25

Toiletries $35

Etc $30 

Gas $50 

Rent $550

Utilities $80

Others

Etc other 

school

car

Food- I spend like $20+ on groceries a week. Probably less if I stop buying snacks and focus on veggies and fruits. Meat I should stop buying until I finish the food!

Clothing It's so sad that I love shopping but I'm trying not to do so much online shopping

Dining To be honest I don't eat out but in case I guess? Well more $ saved

House - Honestly I don't think I will buy much house things for awhile.

Toiletries It's crazy expensive some things are! I hope I rarely use it. I got contacts and sigh... $! Maybe wear glasses until I can get it for free

Etc Random stuff that I have not clue where to put probably random things

Gas  I hopefully get gas once a month and not have to spend so much.

Rent Given. Sigh

Utilities Bill are crazy high. It's not easy with a big house and 4 people but I'll try and see... Water is about $20 and electricity so far is about $45 avg. I suspect winter will be double. I also need to get a heater... sigh. I'm pretty sure I underestimated but we will see! 

others- Things that shouln't be added to my budget becasue it's inevitiable and not avoidable.

Etc other - Stuff that is probably rare and one time. Like flight ticket

school- Any school related shouldn't be in budget. 

car- given sigh. 336.42

So how did I do???

Food (Groceries) - $231.12

- Very over but I did buy lots of canned goods/tv dinners, snacks. I think if I stick to less stuff I can keep within $100. Save some money first then buy snacks. Got to keep track of coupons and stuff too!

Clothing- $66.58

- In budget. Yay. but I know my $35 slim socks were a splurge. I really bought $30. I didn't add the shoes.... shoot. That's like $30.. still in budget!

Dining- $8.37

I have no life. 

House -$25

Really ridiculous cost

Toiletries $42.02

Can't believe the stuff I need

Etc $30.48 

Really random things

Gas $43

Got a $7 gift card... We'll see but gas isn't too bad

Rent $550

EW

Utilities $65.58

Double EW

Total- $1053.41

This month -53.41

So I'm overall over. I need to spend less here and there in Oct. I probably need to get some medicine and thermometer. I haven't been feeling too well. I want some running shoes. Trying to find cheap ones but it's hard!  I will be eating out with one of my best friend next week so probably spend some money. I do have a few free weekends so it could get costly. Hopefully things work out!

Others

Etc other $350 for plane ticket

school- 557.69

car- $366.42

total  $2327.52

Stressed?

In about 12 hours I take one of the most stupid test I've heard of. A professor who picks the most minor and stupid information in a 200+ word text taught in a month.... FML. 56 questions and even knowing the basics won't help. Or so I've heard. I don't know if I should stress or just be happy to not fail too bad. I don't mind failing this test but I want to do well. I like what I'm doing and want to do better. I hope what I'm doing will get me somewhere. I don't want to just "pass" I want to ACE everything. It's a difficult journey so far and I been getting a bit homesick. I do enjoy the family I met and hung out with.

I hope my life here will continue to get better and I make more friends and find something great here. I hope my choice was the right one.


On the other hand, I cannot cannot wait till Nov. I really hope things will only get better and that I won't be disappointed in my grade tomorrow.

I do have confidence I'll do well and make it!

I'm excited for a home cooked meal tomorrow :) yay for Full Moon festival early dinner!




Random insert

Awhile back I went to Morimotos to waste money enjoy some high class iron chef Japanese cuisine. I been here 2 months and all I want is sushi. I'm tempted to buy some Japanese rice and cook that for dinner. I love the chewy texture of short grain rice (?) I might have been Japanese or something but I do love Chinese food. Ahhh the dilemma. Well It was a costly dinner but the food did not disappoint. The lychee martini was pretty strong and I wished I asked for  more lychee. We got the omakase and sushi platter plus an extra dessert. My most memorable was the toro. IT WAS DIVINE. The sashimi were all very fresh... flown from Japan. Sushi was delicious as well. I loved how intricate the food was put out. The chocolate dessert was yummy but I was not like other chocolate desserts that made me swoon. I would definitely drop by when I make bank.  The restaurant was very modern and the bathroom was nice. I love nice bathrooms haha. Suppose to be the best around and I would give it 4/5 just because I would rather save $$ and eat more. I think I can get regular sashimi/rolls at other places and would taste delicious too as long as it's fresh. I do have to give it to Morimoto for having fish that's not freezing cold/water but fresh and not fishy. Not many places have their fish that way. They usually have it around in the fridge and won't taste the same. It might not be as fancy but to me Japanese is all about simple. I did love what I ate but being a cheap Asian, I'll go elsewhere.

brain dead

Honestly, these past few weeks went by so fast and crazy! I feel so behind in my classes despite the studying. HOW CAN ANYONE HAVE ENERGY TO STUDY AFTER GOING TO WORK?! Classes from 8-4:30 most days,  then hours of studying... I really have no life! I am going strong but I still need a break! I'm heading to Staten Island for some family time. :) Even though I have a hard test coming up. But I think I deserve some fun after 2 test.

Sadly my my destressor is retail threapy. If I feel stressed, I rely on online shopping. It's definitely not a good habit but I'm excited to see packages and wear new things. I'm going to be positve and hope for the best.

Gotta get these 4 years done and make $!

On the plus side of east coast, I got to eat more seafood and not go broke!

$3 mussels! super easy and yummy!

 $5 lobster. I don't get why people pay so much to steam it sometimes...



Oh and my loves~ 

 Is it sad that I named them as well? My cute baby arpakasso.

Well I wonder what's going on outside of school... haha. Without Facebook I seriously wouldn't know about the iPhone5. I don't think it's worth the upgrade for me. The iOS6 upgrade had most of the stuff 5 was promoting. Except faster speed and longer screen. I kind of dislike the longer screen b/c it will stick out of my pockets more and can get stolen. But that's just me. It's kind of interesting that 10 years ago smaller was better. I personally prefer smaller phones.

It's long day tomorrow. Despite it being Saturday. FML, FML

Money talk

Been antisocial and no life for a month or so. Sometimes a bit lonely here being independent and hard to meet people but otherwise it's okay. I do have some lovely company.

No I don't have them all but I did buy two from Japan and bf bought me 2 in SF and much bigger size. I may be old but I love anything cute! I don't think that will change. My poor kids will have such a childish mom! I don't have any pictures lying around. Obsession with alpaca stuff animals is not healthy for my wallet either. But they are so hard to resist. They are Arpakasso or Alpacasso that are from crane machines in Japan. I always found alpaca funny animals and they are so soft!

Anyways the main topic is Money and lets see what I said...

Rent- $550

Bills $50?

Groceries $100?

Gas 50?

Dining $50?

Clothing (Shoes/Accessories/etc) $100?

Toiletries/Makeup $25

Save/spend $75? (+100++)

That didn't happen. My defense is that I needed to buy things to settle down and obviously and that cost lots of money. 

Let's review Month 1- August spending

Rent- $550

Utilities- $50.69

Groceries- $203.04

Gas- 0

Dining- $13

Clothing - $92.27

Toiletries/Makeup- $86.71

Miscellaneous $764.07

House- $181.90

Car payment- TBA

School- $21.95

Total- $1,963.63

Yah I am totally over budget. Lets break it down a bit. So Rent is set. Utilities was high because I have one roommate that had to turn on AC when the house is empty and not that hot. UGH! I will do the same in winter though. I know utilities will fluctuate so I'm not that worried and expected it to go over.

Groceries... My defense is that I bought enough protein to last me for months. My weekly groceries now consist of just fresh produces, milk, breakfast and some sandwich goodies. I even stocked up on snacks for at lest few months. Obviously my next month grocery budget is already over... but I am just stocking up so I don't have to buy so much later when I'm too busy. I shop pretty thrifty I think and I will try to buy cheaper things from now on. My goal is under $20 a week. 

Gas- Didn't drive that much but buying things for the place did eat up some gas. Good thing car is pretty gas friendly

Dining- Went out with roommates and end up spending money. Ordered cheap though. We try to opt happy hours and get the most out of our money. It's hard to eat out alone anyways. Except cafeteria but I can live off sandwiches.

Clothing- I stayed in budget! OMG. well I did went a bit crazy buying shoes this month. I'm still searching for gym shoes but might just wait till I go home to get it. I don't have time to work out. I did get a Yoga mat. Hopefully during a break I can do a workout video... Pretty glad I didn't succumb to online shopping that much.. I am still on the lookout for shorts.

Toiletries/makeup- I had to re buy lots of liquid items and sanitary stuff so it end up adding up. I think I'm set for at least half a year so it will even out.

Miscellaneous- These were kind of random house items, supplies and furniture. Stayed pretty in budget buying major things like a bed. I could have settle for a used bed but I didn't really want to deal with someone's bed. GROSS. It's a shame I have to give it up in 4 years.

House- It's suppose to be mostly household items like cleaning supplies and paper napkin stuff but I threw in some furniture and bedding so it's a bit messy. Spending a lot more than I imagined.

Car- So my parents bought me a new car and it of course cost money. Luckily interest is cheap so we can pay it off slowly. I am sad that there is some scratches already. One I did and one I have no clue where it came from. I don't love owning a car because it's a lot of responsibility. Just means more money my parents will have to put up with. Sigh

School- I already spent $500+ in Sept. and over $1000 in Oct. on stupid supplies/equipment. I hate it. fml

Overall. I think by Oct my budget will come into play. I am more conscious now about spending money and hopefully it will work out.

Back to studying... life of a student fml

It's been awhile

I should be meticulously studying the endless notes I have and prepare for classes every day but it's only been a week so far and I feel like I can slack just a little. Started this new path of mine and I think I made a good choice to start at a place where I know no one and step out of my comfort zone. At times I do feel a bit lonely and wondered if moving 3,000 miles was the right choice. The extra money spent... is the experience worth it? I haven't found anyone I click with but I am doing fine. I don't feel too lonely becasue I am very determine to succeed in my profession. Having friends isn't a priority even though it would be nice. I do miss home and bf and friends but my new life just doesn't have the time.

I do still slack off here and there but I am definitely working hard to get things done and not fall behind. I am quite shocked that I don't feel too alone, worried, depressed or homesick. Guess my mental state is working pretty well.

HAHA. As for spending.... I think I max out any quota I envisioned. The amount of money I spent is probably more than I even have. I did save all my receipts and made mental notes to spend later. The bills do add up... Sigh. Which is another reason I must succeed. Money does not grow on trees so work hard on your studies...

So far I do like the college I'm attending and the location makes it pretty easy to just study. People are friendly and I think it will get better. If not I have family all around that I can't wait to bond with.

I think my decision may not have been the best choice but will get to where I want. I can feel it

Lacoste... super sale?!

Lately I been on a super shopping spree. it's kind of sad looking at the bills and the packing is exponentially increasing. I went to H&M recently and their leftover sale items was actually pretty nice after a few hours of going through it with my friends. We all bought a bit too much. Our excuse? We need work clothes. I am really starting to dread sale season. Or maybe being stuck at the mall for a long period of time... then again internet sales are even deadly.

BUT one sale that I cannot believe is Lacoste. I saw it coincidentally on fb/slickdeals and it was a $50 off lacoste.com . I quickly picked out a polo to test my luck and to my surprise, it was $3.25 after tax. I tried to get bf to buy something and debated if I should placed more orders and risk it being cancel. Sadly, it was gone in a hour or so and couldn't buy more.

I know it is real since it's from the official website, even if it's not real, the price isn't bad for fake either lol. I am quite happy  the one I bought was the right size and long. I seen tiny Lacoste polos and are unwearable for my long waist.

I am thinking over and over about the purchase I made recently. I cannot turn it away :( My poor wallet. I think I spent about $200 again. I must ban any more shopping for the next few months. I hope sale season stops soon >.<



Damage today $3.25
Total damage $544 (I round up/down all the time)

Spring Cleaning

Well technically it is summer. I been packing for school and realize how much lovely clothes I have and should wear more often. I think I will only buy things I love and will last a long time in my wardrobe. I realize how much money I spent and feel a bit guilty. I already cleaned my closet numerous times but it seems that it's endless.

On the other hand, I did more shopping. fml. I honestly cannot justify anything I buy anymore. I don't really need it. Guess it's just an addiction.

I returned this light blazer. It was super cute but was $60+ dollars?! Bought it for free shipping so I returned it. I did like the open back but think it's a bit too "yeah" for work nevertheless.

 Got this at Nordstrom Rack. It was $11 +tax. I love floral so I was drawn to it. and think it will be super cute to pair with lots of work outfits! (at lest that's what I tell myself)

 I wanted a shell with a bow tie thing cuz I think it's very mature but cute! Good for work. You can take the ribbon off as well. It's a bit big even as a small but I plan to sew it in a bit or wear it with a skirt and tuck it in that way.
It was about $17 by Calvin Klein.

 My Zara order. I am pretty sure I'm going to return all the items since small is apparently too small for me. Damn Europeans. I do fit Small but I'm scared it will shrink so I reordered mediums to see if I like it better. I reordered it in coral.  $10. Return for now

 The tank top was super nice quality.... and small-ish. $8. Reordered it in M to see. I love the color and quality makes it work friendly. I was debating if I wanted to buy more. Sigh. Return

I am sadly returning these. They are super nice but so small! $20 so I was already hesitating. I thought I bought the black/gold one but I guess it didn't work out. Return

 I love teal and wanted a oversize blazer so I had to buy it. It was $25 but I quickly signed up for the 20% coupon thanks to my iphone on H&M website so it was $20 +tax. Mad happy with it but I know it's cheap material but I been lusting over for a black blazer.... yeah I will never be satisfy.

This was an order on www.flirtcatalog.com It was private sale and like 85% off. I think this was $7-8 and the material is super thin and I think I need a belt to make me look skinner. Well I did buy it for clubbing nights or something so as long as it looks nice for a night or two it should be fine.

This was the other dress I bought. I think this was $8-9 and the order I had to pay $5 shipping with the above dress. I LOVE this dress! I regret not buying the purple one as well. It is a little pokey because of the bling. It's much better quality and lined.

On the other note. My bf bought me an early bday present. Beside Recchiuti chocolate, I got the lovely Tous wallet! It came with a note books and Tous chocolate. So fancy. I love the teddy design and pink lining. My bf is really bad with presents so I'm so happy he tried so hard this time around!

One of my fav chocolate~ Recchiuti! So hard to savor the box and not just kill it all. My fav is the fleur de sel one. LOVE

I have bought lots of shoes recently.... next post. 

I am in need of diet. I been nonstop eating out and mostly unhealthy. I am hoping I did not gain weight. I been convincing myself that I will starve in the east coast. Probably won't happen but I am truly too lazy to exercise.

Damage today: $66

Total: $541

Damn in less than 3 months I spent so much! fml. Starting next month I will start a budgeting plan. I will keep track of all spending and come up with a decent budget so I don't feel too guilty about my tuition and parents paying for most of it. But for now my parents decided $1000 plus the credit card if it isn't enough so I plan to spend wisely and not touch credit card unless I need to. Probably transfer most of it to myself to get some points built up. I wanted to get a new credit card to get some $ back, a dollar is a dollar but too many options out there.

Rent- $550

Bills $50?

Groceries $100?

Gas 50?

Dining $50?

Clothing (Shoes/Accessories/etc) $100?

Toiletries/Makeup $25

Save/spend $75? (+100++)

I am not sure of bills... Internet between 4 people, probably $10 and electric will probably run $200 average so I guess $25+ but I add a bit more for now and see... 

Back in dorm days, I spent about $30+ a week on dinner food for like 5-6 days for 2-3 people, lunch was like $10-20 a week for 2 people for sandwich or ramen and stuff. I estimate about $100 for myself. If I'm super cheap. Hopefully. Gotta not be lazy and make food but I need to study a lot fml.

I don't think I'll drive since I plan to walk to class since it's so close  and I know I'm underestimating the cost of gas and driving. But at most I'll drive to is groceries and rare trips to NY or NJ maybe...... I will see how this will last. I do have roomies so maybe freeload a bit on rides to similar destination. 

Dining. I am positive I will be lazy and order out and I know $50 is probably not enough since I want to see and eat around the east coast and the experience requires $. I love good food but I might go splurge on cooking for myself... not like that will happen either. Cross fingers!

Ah shopping. Honestly, I doubt I'll spend $100 a month. Unless the mall is godly close. I don't recall much shopping area which might be a good thing but I online shop a lot which is bad. I am obsessed with good deals fml. But $100 seems decent, but with Christmas sales and stuff I'm scared for my wallet.

Toiletries/Makeup are probably once in a blue moon. I do have a decent amount of makeup and skin care that I plan to bring over and hopefully finish the products! I also have godly amounts. But I know some things I'll need to stock up when there and will probably cost $50 but that's it for like at least a year lol so maybe I'll save that $25.

 

Ah savings. I have so much stuff I want. (since $100 for shopping is not enough fml but I will manage) I really want to take the opportunity to travel when I'm in the east coast. I lust going to Europe and 6 hr flight makes it so tempting. I am pretty thrifty so I think somehow I'll save enough. I know my parents will pay for some too but I want to be earning my trip (sorta) and not rely on my parents who work so hard for me already. I estimate about $200 save a month (yah impossible but we'll see) for 4 years will get me $9600. Enough for a few trips even. I know I should use the $ to fly home but I know my family will cover that for me. My mom's boss said she'll deposit $100 in my account every month but I don't know if she's joking. I am trying to get a job at school as well like the library for like 5 hrs a week that's about $200! Anything is better than nothing. I'm super stingy so I hope things work out but with the stress level of professional school... I think I'll splurge a lot. Sigh but if things go as planned I should save $500 a month, $6000 a year should be enough for Europe lol.

And... the spending part. I know there will be emergency situations and possibly school related stuff. Equipment will be costly!

Debt. Well we can't live in a nice world where tuition is free? It's about 30k a year and my spendings of $12k a year equals 42k (Add in like $1000 for books, equipment and stuff= 43k/yr) so that's $172k for 4 years!!! Plus interest probably $200k. It is pretty much a house.... maybe condo actually not really. Gotta think if it's worth trying to get that 6 digit salary. Which is ideal but the recession really sucks! My parents are getting a loan for me so I'm so thankful my debt won't be about $250k instead. I hope I get the $8k subsidized loan a year and that's $32k. my parents can hold off getting the loan for. I really hope to secure a decent job like 80-90k++++  when I'm done. I do want to do a 5th year but I really don't know.... Hate my unknown future. Hope something good will happen thanks to politics. Staying positive!

Well for the last weekends of July, I'm pretty booked out. Date with my girls, bf bday all weekend long, then Napa on 28th, family dinner 29th and a week to pack. fml. I am in need of $ and diet and I feel bad bf is spending a lot for our last dates for awhile... I will try harder and party even harder

Procrastinate

 I don't know about you but my procrastination multitasking needs help. I have the attention span of a goldfish.... Probably. I have to be doing two plus things at once or I feel unproductive. It's fine for now since I'm on break but when school starts I need to focus on studying. I don't think that would work out very well.

I cannot just sit and watch TV/drama/movie at home. I feel unproductive so I will either exercise, eat, web surf, mindless task etc. Not healthy! Or if I'm doing laundry, cleaning or napping  I keep a movie on and occasionally during the chore, stop and watch it.

Even reading manga. I can be continuously reading a few manga at once. I might get bored of it, switch to something new and get back to it later. WTF

Don't think anything really stays in my head. -___-

I think the computer is the main problem. But it totally sucks when you need it to do HW or study.

I will pay more attention if there is pressure from another person but I rather study alone.

Sigh one of my bad habits. If only I can master it and be able to do everything efficiently.....


Random fact of the day, I like to eat cereal hot. I don't like cold things. Seriously afriad of cold so I will microwave my milk and eat the cereal hot. I know it gets soggy faster and not as crunchy but I think it's worth it to avoid cold milk. I do eat cold cereal but usually let milk sit out a bit so it's less cold but prefer it hot. I eat ice cream normally tho!

Alpaca

My current favorite thing is... Alpaca! Mainly since I stumbled on Arpakasso at Japantown. I always thought they were cute but omg they are even cuter as stuff animals.

From google search. ARENT they adorable!?!!!

From my backyard. JK JK. I pass by them when I go hiking in my backyard. LOL. My backyard is actually a park but it requires a 10min walk to get to the entrance since I do live on a mountain. They live few blocks from me. The usually don't hang with the goats but they were cleaning their land that day so I got to see the alpaca and goats battle it out. I want to hug one so badly!

Been thinking about playing harvest moon so I can have an alpaca in my farm.

Summer Heat

I am not loving the heat. But I hate the few cold days we had recently. I'm so picky. Nothing great has happened but I cannot be so pessimistic. I should be grateful and give my gratitude to what I have now. I been seeing lots of people and staying in touch so I'm glad for it. I'm excited for the weekend and 4th of July and cannot wait for the memories I'll make before I leave CA for awhile.

I also been eating a lot and my new camera is seriously makes things 100x more yummy. Recently I went to Melting Pot for the first time thanks to LivingSocial and I thought it was a great experience. The deal was for bottle of wine, appetizer, 2 salad, 2 entree and 2 dessert drinks. Even with the $65 for $130, we ended up spending $60+ more because of tax, tips and chocolate fondue. So the total was around $130. It's not worth the price at all but the monthly specials/deals make it better.We did get a lot of alcohol which wasn't a good idea since my bf had to drive and I just drank most of it. I did have lots of fun and would go back if there was a cheaper deal.

 

Cheers to a long dinner! It took about 3+ hours!! We were there from 6:30 dinner and stayed till 10 something. I think I was a bit drunk but I seriously didn't think we were there that long!

 First course was the artichoke cheese fondue. I loved the apples! The bread tasted stale bleeh and chips were nice. Veggies were good. We also had a salad but I was kind of hungry and didn't take a picture. Mines had too much dressing.

 Main course was the seafood trio with salmon, mahi mahi and shrimp. The fish were okay and shrimp was the best. Bf got the filet mignon with portobello mushrooms. There was a side of veggies too. Broccoli, mushroom and potato. If you just had entree, you won't feel full honestly but it was fun since I was drunk haha.

We got 2 dessert drinks that I didn't take a picture of but one was a muscat and another was a coffee drink. I was super drunk by then. The dessert we got was I think the smores one. I really liked the marshmallow the most. The brownie and cake were so so. I ended up just eating the chocolate out of the pot at the end....

I would go back once in a blue moon but otherwise I'll stick to my Asian hot pot at home. I prefer a lot more veggies!


As for shopping.... sigh. it isn't a good thing. I just kept buying things these past week. shame on me!

 

 Work heels, $20. It's pretty nice quality. I should have waited till I was in the east coast so I won't have to drag so much stuff but they were cute, cheap and leather. got at 6pm.com. Lemming on getting so C flats but are $30.

 

Floral belt, $3. I really liked the design. It was too big for me so I had to sew the sides together. I really love it but wonder when I'll actually wear it... Found it at Ross.

 Rainbow flip flops. I actually wanted thin straps but they were sold out. I guess these are not bad either and I been wanting a pair for ages. They were $25 even with 50% discount. I literally live in flip flops and I have so many broken pairs so I think it's a good deal to invest in these. I am going to wear it in the east coast. I want to buy more flip flops from AF or Hollister before I leave but probably wait till super sale and order from there.

 Blazer from H&M $22. I don't love it but don't hate it either. I think it would be good for work. I don't like the buttons but for $22 it's a good deal. I really hope the Zara blazer gets cheaper but I can live with this one for now until I get rich and invest in some nice ones. But chances are I'll not wear much coats when I work.

 Apron, $12. Super random buy. I think I'll give it to my mom or use it to bake or something. I think it's so cute though..... Sigh impulse buy.

 Dress skirt. Express $15. I prefer skirt/dress over pants any day. I am a girly girl so I love the heels/skirt. Pants make me look weird! But I'll wear it regardless. It's a bit cheap but good appropriate length.

Victoria secret bra, 2 for $43. I wanted to Gorgeous line for awhile so I cave in to the semi-annual sale. I hate tax and pretty bras. They are super comfy and I LOVE the halter option~ and the design is cute!

I really don't want to add up the total cost...

Total : $140
Total damage: $475

I still haven't added my new winter boots, bf presents, and zara... ugh. I wish I had a job now.

Gratitude

It's the seasons of graduations. Watching people end one chapter in their lives, I think about my new life in less than two months. I am trying very hard to be more humble, kinds, optimistic and grateful. Why? Well I want to be a better person and I feel like it's a new start for me. New place, new people, new life. Nothing familiar and it may be scary too. But I want to come out a new me too. I am grateful for who I am but I know i can do better.

For example, I get jealous, I compare myself to others, I hate myself at times, I lash out on people, I get annoyed at the smallest things. I am pretty spoiled. These days, I catch myself doing these things and I try to reflect and stop myself. Old habits are hard to change but I think it can work. My current solutions is think of all the things I have and be grateful. Like I yelled at my bf this weekend, I start thinking about how great he is and how our time is short, I should be grateful he's here with me and not mad at him. It applies to all things. Even bad waiters. I imagine them having a bad day or things aren't going smoothly and makes me feel better about the situation. Also grateful he's working as a waiter so I don't have to get my own food.

I been trying to be a better person and it's a lot of work. I can't help but feel less awesome becasue all my friends are working in the real world while it would take me 4 years to even start. I know I have all the time in the world but it just sucks to be left behind. I think moving away is good for me so I can be around people with the same goals as me. I believe what I am doing will make my life better and I would become happy. I have loads of doubts but I think this is my passion.

I have heard if you want something badly enough, it might come true. Like the universe listens to you. I believe that if you want something it will happen like magic but I also believe that you set yourself up to your goal. Like I want to do _______ so I do what I can and get there. Did it mean the universe didn't do shit? It can also be interpreted that the universe helped lead me there because I got the opportunity. Think of it as luck. Sometimes it's coincidence and others times questionable. Either way, I am a positive person so I'm going to ask the universe 10 things that I want.

1. Become awesome in my profession and find a 100k+ job doing what I love and making a difference for people
2. Get married before I am 30 and have the perfect wedding with all my family and friends. I want grandpa there please.
3. Have about 3-4 kids. Two boys and a girl or two of each. All would be loved equally and they better behave and become super smart and grow up to be perfect gentlemen and ladies that can take care of me too!
4. Make enough money to spoil my parents, my husbands parents, my kids, my brother and my relatives and if there's any left over my friend. Oh and me too! My husband spoils me and I'll see what I can do for him.
5. Keep contact with my loved ones: family and friends (new or old) and have lots of fun!
6. Be in the happiest relationship ever where we will live happily ever after, growing old together.
7. My family and friends stay super healthy and live long happy lives. I hope they can fulfill their dreams before they pass away. I don't want terrible accidents/tragedy.
8.  I don't really have any more wishes. My most important is to be happy and healthy with lost of money to enjoy with family and friends. So let's wish that the Earth stays healthy and the cute animals thrive too. People are corrupted but eh I hope we become peaceful and happy too!
9. I guess a secret dream is I become a model and can make some $ on the side haha but I know if you don't pursue it, it won't happen on its own. But it's not a goal in my life but a wish
10. Oh travel the world and see the 7 wonders and go to JAPAN many times and just travel yearly! and hopefully do it with friends or something. IT'S about the people you're with to create the memories with you not just the place itself.
11. I'm going to cheat and add one more. I did give my 8th wish to the world! I want to be a happy, caring and optimistic person that is loved by everyone :)
12. ok ok, one more. I want to be skinny, skinny LEGS and big eyes and soft glowing complexion. Ultimately healthy but I want to be hot. I want confidence

 Well life goals has always been engraved in my head. I do hope they come true some day. I have more random wishes but lets not bother the universe.


Oh I bought a DSLR. Nikon D5100 during amazon deal. I caved in because I wanted to take nice pictures. I have slight regret not getting Canon but I think it will work out. Better not regret and think positive!! I am just one of those people who HATE getting the bad end of the deal. I hate myself buying something that goes on sale the next day, week, month.... or even ever. If I buy something, I better not see it ever again. Except for food. HAHA

But seriously the DSLR makes my crappy pasta look good

The dragon roll looks way better too!

 Now I hope it does wonder on my face and not gain 10 pounds. Speaking of pounds I started to work out. I hope I can keep it up. Even if it's 15-25 min so far... I literally got sore doing 10 min of insanity workout videos. -___- If I want to be super skinny and model status, I have to start somewhere right?

Charles Jourdan

 I cave into new shoes.

I have never heard of this brand but they make some expensive shoes. I assume it's not one of the mainstream brands but at retail $295, it better be nice. It is French after all. I purchased it for $20 from isaay.com at the 60% off sale and I think that would be as much as I'll pay for this. The quality is nice, all leather, but the upper leather is scuffed up. Must have been abused in the box or something. The rest of the shoe looks brand new. I can foresee it giving me splinters but they are so cute~ I'll see when I do wear it out.


Spent: $20
Total: $355

Rewind

I have been quite busy... not really but I want to be. I spent my first week and a half watching 7 seasons of How I met Your Mother.

I guess I was on 9gag too much and had too much free time. Me and le bf loved the show and I watched it every free minute I had (which was most of the time). I really loved how the show was written and how the stories and themes come together through the seasons. Little bits of the mom is shown every season and teases the audience. How the character grows and changes as the year pass by. Did I mention I have a thing for analyzing literature? Anyways I love all the characters a lot and they grow on you. It's not everyone's cup of tea. Reminded me of Friends... which since I have the time, maybe I'll go watch that too.

I did do other things since I last updated~ I went out and saw my friends too!!! I tentatively secured housing in the East. Guess reality is slowly hitting and the packing will start soon. I think it would be exciting but still a bit scary. I started buying things that I might need there but only sold here. A mental list is building and I been having dreams about moving and forgetting things. sigh.

I did keep my Marc Jacobs bag and this is my 3rd from the brand. Finally caved in and got leather. I don't know why I'm attracted to the brand. I have watches, jewelry as well. I really loved how this bag is perfect for traveling or places with lots of people or walking a lot. It doesn't get in the way and I don't have to worry about someone stealing it. Although it's magnetic closure and easy to open. It does have an extra zipped up compartment for extra security. It doesn't hold a lot without feeling too heavy since it's leather but I really don't need that much and helps me be more organized.

So what's in my bag? I usually bring out a few more things if I have a bigger bag but these are necessity. Except the Nintendo DS and I have a bottle of water occasionally. My iPhone is missing because it was taking the picture. I been sticking a cardigan in the zipped compartment and still have room! 

I will start from the top left and clockwise.

1. Gucci sunglasses. I am obsessed with sunglasses and vow to have a collection of designer ones someday. Mainly becasue I wore glasses forever before I got contacts so I envy and lusted over sunglasses I never wore. They are plastic black ones with the logo on side. Baby bought it for Christmas or some holiday...

2. Coach wallet. I really want a long wallet but this one is sufficient for now. I bought it at the factory store last year. It matches the bag

3. Chargers. The thing I hate about iPhone is battery life. The car one doesn't work that well but will do if it's an emergency. I recently cracked my iPhone and need to fix it cuz $200 to replace it is crazy! When is the 5 coming out!?

4. L'occitane lotion. I don't find it great or bad. But I have like 10 bottles lying around. (Thanks to friends, free ones and self bought) It's convenient size and a little goes a long way.

5. Revlon lipstick, Burt bee grapefruit lip balm, Aquafina lip balm. I have a thing for lips. Try very hard not to ever forget them. I hate having chapped lips!!  I have the softlips too since it has SPF. Got to protect them from the sun. Honestly, it's a must have on a daily basis. The lips need attention or will look like crap and is easily sun damage. My lip balm collection is huge. If you don't have it handy and lying around, you won't use it.

6. Eye drops. I wear contacts too long and I have allergies so I carry them around to refresh them. I really like the Rhoto brand as well. It's so minty refreshing!

7. Nintendo DS. I haven't touched it in awhile since I been entertained. I play when I'm bored obviously. I usually just need my iPhone but the battery sucks so I have backup?

8.  Mint. I try to bring some candy. You never know when you need sugar! (Even though it's fake sugar) I stopped eating gum ever since I learn it works out the jaw muscles and make it look huge!

9. Coach card holder(?) and keys. I bought the coach thing to hold cash/credit cards when I use my small clutch bags but on regular days, it holds gift cards, membership cards, discount cards etc. I also hooked my keys. (The kitty hides a key too!) I need something big to hold my keys. Who hasn't lost their key in their bag before? I still cannot find my keys with that thing on it -___- I need a bigger key chain.

10. Pen. I try to bring a pen out in case I need to write down stuff like a number or address. I know cell phones can do it too but I find i faster to just write. I usually have receipts in my wallet so I have paper too!

Other junk I may have..... band-aids, hand sanitizer, more lip products, kindle, camera, coin bag.. Oh and ADVIL. That's what's missing!!! I have so many bottles of Advil it's annoying. I hate when I forget to bring Advil. The day I forget, is the day I NEED it. I have terrible cramps. I think almost every single one of my bags have an Advil bottle since I keep buying them. My bf ended up keeping a bottle in his car which is a lifesaver.



So about my shopping... I've been good, haven't bought anything.... except a DSLR. I still don't know if it's a good buy. I bought the Nikon D5100. It's still a good deal with freebies from amazon but since the Canon T4i came out, the T2i and T3i will slowly go on sale. I would probably save $100 or more in the process.... Just taxes in CA is a bitch. I been using Canon so the jump to Nikon is... new. There's always the "upgrade" and it's a pet peeve for me to buy something that goes on sale few weeks later. UGH. I can always return the Nikon since I don't need a camera yet but I know if I don't buy it, I will not jump on it for awhile. I really want to take some nice pictures before I go and when I travel :)


Well see.... sigh it's a long but short summer.

Summer Love

Summer is my favorite season. You generally feel happier and excited becuase the sun is out and it is time to live your life.  As probably the last summer where I really can relax, I am trying to squeeze as much out of California before I head east. I hate waitlist btw. I wish they just reject me. By now I am now 99% east coast.

I was talking to my bf about things that I need to see or do before I miss it too much, especially when it's summer and it's really the moment to go crazy. I am so afriad of the cold! The list is actually pretty big but I am going to focus on things I can do and want to do before I leave and will not get on the other side. Although I'm pretty sure there would be opportunities to explore and find things I'll love too.

1. Smittens ice cream, heck any ice cream is fine when it's scorching hot. But my love for salted caramel forces me to drive out to SF any day
2. Take pika pika. I love sticky pics and decorating them. I know I can do it on my phone but I always liked having a solid copy to keep as memories
3. Go to museum on Bank of America free day. Probably will miss June's free day. Maybe July
4. House of prime rib. The salad is divine. I might find better but it's unforgettable
5. Really good sushi. I doubt I'll be near really good sushi so I should eat my fill soon
6. Really good Chinese food. I know there's a chinatown but I tried it and I miss mines. Sigh
7. See friends. I will miss them so much but at the same time I'm excited to make new ones. So bittersweet
8. Waterworld. It would be nice to have some fun in the sun right?
9. Go to LA/Vegas. Probably will not happen as I will literally have no time to go but I will dream of these places until I come back
10. Napa. I really want to eat at Bouchon but since NY has one I guess if I'm desperate I can drive 
11. Party hard for my early bday, bf bday and farewell party. I don't know if it includes alcohol or just semi-formal dinner because I'm too old.

Well that's it for now. There is always restaurants I want to try but nothing I'll miss yet. I think I need to do more summery things to do like go to beaches than stay at home watching How I Met Your Mother or playing games all summer.

Back to financial issues. I been not spending as much and I only purchase two items. The rest of my money probably went to food. Pat on back except one cost $222. fml. My mom did get me some stuff at Ann Taylor. About $30 for a skirt and top. Guess I'll add it to my spending.

Bought this top at Marshall for $11. I love big tops and I don't have anything lavender. I think it's cute.

This has not arrived yet, my maybe Marc by Marc Jacobs Natasha shoulder bag for $222. Still debating if I will keep it or maybe sell it? I was attracted to silver hardware as gold is kind of tacky for me. I know gold is mega popular and I have gold items but if I had a choice I will always choose silver. I got it at net-a-poter. One of the most deadly shopping sites for designer duds. The discounts in their sales are to die for and no tax and free shipping/return!?! I wanted a cross body bag as it's more "safe" to travel with.... not that I will be but I can always prepare right?  It is harder to yank something over your body vs a tote you are weakly holding or just hanging on your shoulders. I also eyed a Miu Miu, Mulberry bag but over budget so I'm hoping this will satisfy me.  I know I should stop buying but ugh it's an addiction. The Valentino sale was also very tempting because I am a sucker for bows.

Well I think it's a good thing that I been pickier about buying items vs buying cuz it looks good at the moment. But sadly my wallet isn't that happy. Doubt it would be happy when I invest in a DSLR. I don't know how much I have lying around anymore... sigh


Today's debt $263 fml
Total: $335

25 Things I’ve Learned In My 20s

  So I saw this online and it really really applies to me now at 23 almost 24... fml. I can literally name situations that these happened to me. Some occurred before my 20s but hey 20s are suppose to be some fun times before you become an adult.

 

25 Things I’ve Learned In My 20s

1. You can’t date a jerk and expect to turn them into a good person. Jerks are fully committed to being unpleasant. Those brief moments of tenderness they give you are designed to trip you up and give you false hope. It’s best to stay away altogether.
• Dated a jerk at 18 and you can imagine how it turned out. Learned to just stay away from the jerks and never fall for their tricks and go for the nice guy :)
2. The rumors are true: your metabolism does slow down as you get older! That means if you’re still eating whatever you want, there’s a good chance you’ll start to gain an awkward amount of weight. It won’t be too drastic but your clothes will start to hang differently on your body and you’ll feel an overall feeling of unattractiveness. Start to be conscious of what you eat and strive to live a healthier lifestyle if you want to get your teen body back. (Let’s be real though, that might not ever come back.)
• I guess this doesn't apply that much to me YET. (knock on wood) I hover between the same weight. I definitely been gaining some but it doesn't show. Got to start exercising more often and eat less junk!
3. You’re going to lose touch with a lot of your friends. With some people, it will be expected but with others it will feel like a punch to the stomach. No friendship is truly safe in your twenties. You’re undergoing so many personal and professional changes that there’s bound to be some casualties along the way. Don’t worry though. You’ll end up with the ones that matter. If someone’s no longer in your life, it’s for a reason.
1. I know I lost touch with some high school friends. I'm trying hard now to keep in touch with my college friends but that would probably be harder during the next four years. High school is such an awkward stage whereas college everyone is just nice and chill. I do have some best friends and that won't just change. Even if things aren't as great as it used to, as life likes to screw you, I would be there for them in a heartbeat. I don't doubt my love for them
4. You’ll be jealous of everyone who’s more successful than you. That’s okay. Just transfer that jealousy into something productive, like working really hard so you can one day eclipse them and make them feel jealous of YOU.
• I am totally jealous of all my friends who have jobs and are successful because I am still going to school and making $0.00000. I hope I can make them jealous but I really don't care. Money is to provide a better life for my family and friends. Not to ruin relationships. 
5. You’ll question every decision you make and never feel completely certain that you made the right choice. It’s pointless to wonder though. You’re here now so you might as well make it be the right decision.
• YEP. I am already feeling like I made all the wrong choices about applying to schools and my choice. I am having a hard time convincing myself that I'm like moving east. I guess I will spend the next few days accepting this and start getting excited for my new life.
6. You’re going to give your heart to a few people who don’t deserve it. Then, one day you’ll come to your senses and ask them to give it back.
• I did and it hurts but I got right back up. I guess it can apply to friends or even family that don't deserve your love too.  I will take it as a life lesson and learn from it.
7. You’ll see your parents get older. You’ll come home during Christmas break and see new lines developing on their faces. One day it’ll just hit you that your parents are old and going to die. There’s nothing you can do about it, besides treat them with kindness and visit as much as your budget permits.
• I don't think I SEE this yet. I left home but came back weekly. I do see my grandparents get old and that really made me care more. I try to be there more often but at the moment I cannot wait to move out. But I know this will apply to me soon.
8. You’ll have a boss who makes you feel like you’re nothing. It doesn’t have to be in a Devil Wears Prada way. The cruelty can be much more subtle. Don’t let them get to you though. They have no idea who the hell you really are and you’re probably going to have their job someday so…
• Nope, not yet. I hope I don't have a diabolic boss in my field. It's professional right?
9. Doing drugs is fun until it’s not, until it starts affecting your life in negative ways and leaves you feeling guilty and wrecked. If that happens, you should stop doing them.
• I never do drugs. My ex taught me not to use it or I'll end up like him. No offense, but it really screws you up and make bad choices in life that end up hurting other people... like me. I think it's disgusting anyways
10. You’re going to puke in public. It’s fine. No one cares. Just puke.
• I did it once at 3AM. NEVER again.
11. You’ll know how to make twenty dollars last an entire week because you spent almost all of your paycheck on groceries at Whole Foods and drunk cab rides. This lesson in frugality will serve you well.
• Already do. I have friends during college years who buy hundreds of dollars of groceries and expect us to split it. I learn say no and cook for myself. It's just ridiculous how expensive things are these days. My bf and I currently try to cook meals at home and watch movies at home instead. Though he insist we eat out more before we leave but I know that I need to practice cheap eating. I never really notice it, but I met a girl who really struggle with living because their family isn't well off. I know my family isn't the richest out there but we get bills paid and enough to splurge on clothes and junk. Even so, I am a cheapskate so I guess this doesn't apply to me that badly except I do need to buy less and SAVE since tuition sucks.
12. You’re going to betray your convictions. You’re going to feel shame. You’re going to continue to put yourself in situations that aren’t good for you. And then, slowly but surely, it will become less frequent. It might not ever go away completely but it won’t be as bad. In the meantime, stop shame spiraling about it. It gets you nowhere.
• I think I did it when I was dating my ex. I really did things I would have never done and feel guilty. I learn the hard way and my friends and family forgave me. I guess I need to learn to look at the brighter things in life like how I have wonderful families and friends.
13. Loving yourself is hard. Hating yourself is harder.
• I hate my weak self and will need to become stronger.
14. You’re going to hook up with someone who you would never touch in the daylight sober. Just don’t freak out too much about it. Consider it to be your good deed for the day.
• I hope this doesn't happen. I am happy with my bf
15. You’re going to have people in your life who are toxic. They may say that they love you, they may say that they have your back, but they don’t. Get rid of them.
• I think I know of them but at the moment I will do nothing. I hate confrontations and I rather see the good in people and try to understand why they may be toxic. I have one friend who had it hard her whole life and nothing goes her way so she's a bitch but I will still love her. I have enough love to give even if they don't deserve it. Getting hurt is a different story 
16. You’ll have moments with someone that are so intense, it’ll feel like you’ve been electrocuted back to life. You’ll hold on to these moments for a long time. They’ll give you hope when you’re going through the motions.
• I admit my ex gave me this feeling and my bf makes me feel good everyday. I am just glad that I have someone who has my back now and I can say anything to. They do exist. Every time my bf comes pick me up I get the most giddy feeling that sometimes it feels like the first date.
17. You’ll always care about your first love. That doesn’t make you crazy, it just makes you human. When relationships end, it’s not so cut and dry. You carry everyone you’ve ever loved into every relationship thereafter.
• I don't care as much anymore just because he cheated and broke my heart. I do wonder about him sometimes. It is HARD getting over first love and it was even harder having him come back to make me emo. I am glad I went for the nice guy ;)
18. You’ll enter your twenties as a fashion disaster and (hopefully) leave them looking fantastic. If you don’t know how to put yourself together by then, I really don’t know what to tell you.
• I admit, I bought some random clothing. My style is SLOWLY moving away from graphic tees to plain tees and more professional. I love fashion though so maybe some things won't change. I do think I look good tho.
19. You’ll realize that the Internet can be a cruel son of a bitch but, you know, www.whatever.com.
• I learn not to trust the internet. Do more research first through multiple searches and learn to pick out the right answer.
20. So much of what you think matters doesn’t actually matter at all. It’s kind of rude. Like, thanks for making me believe in things that are ultimately so inconsequential, you jerk.
• At the moment family, friends, bf, job is the most important. The only one that would change is probably job/money. I know it's not the most important but makes the others more happy. I guess ultimately as long as you matter not else will.
21.  You’ll treat someone terribly. Whether it to be a lover or your friend, there’ll be someone whose feelings you take for granted. We focus too much on whether or not someone is hurting us. The reality is that we might actually be the one who’s hurting someone.
• I totally AGREE. I feel like I'm not the best friend or girlfriend but I do try to reach out. Especially now that I'm moving away. I will work harder on this and try to be a good friend/gf/daughter. I need to be calmer and accept things that come my way.
22. Doing “grown-up things” doesn’t make you a grown up. Shopping for housewares, buying a plant, embracing domesticity — these things don’t create maturity. If you’re still a baby who hasn’t figured things out, you’ll remain a baby, no matter how many times you pay your rent on time.
• I totally agree. I think I will never truly grow up until my kids are old.
23. Don’t force yourself into loving anyone. If it’s not working in the beginning, it’s probably not going to work ever.
• I think being a hopeless romantic makes it hard. I really cannot hate someone because I try to look for the good and give benefit of the doubt.
24. You are so lucky to have everything that you have. Stop crying about an unreturned text message and get some perspective.
• I admit I do get a little sad that messages get ignored. This really makes me think that I should focus on the better things in my life so that this crap is irreverent.
25. Don’t go too long without having sex. Ever.
    
    • Does it apply to a virgin? I am curious but just not 100% ready. I'm glad my bf is patient. Just I feel so insecure about myself that it is affecting me as a person. 
    
    
    
    
    In conclusion, I need to keep growing and learning. Learn to love myself with my flaws and all and love others too. I will continue this journey called life and hope I will get a happy ending.
    The Secret is to think positive and appreciate the little things that make the bad ones seem obsolete.

Moody

I guess it's just one of those days (or the time of the month) where you feel like nothing is going right and there is so much uncertainty in life that makes you want to cry. I been in such a bad mood that I keep yelling and crying... and I don't know what's wrong. So many things are going on and I really don't want to face it. I want to be stronger. I know what needs to be done yet there is no motivation. I am probably in denial of all the changes to come. I hope in the end I become a better person but for now I will to hide in my bed and forget my worries

Draw Something

I love this game! I was a total addict but people stopped playing so I only play w my bf sometimes now. These are some that I drew and saved. Totally regret not saving all of them! I might have more... It's all drawn with fingers. I end up buying a stylus but I get too lazy to use it. Enjoy!!

 I am so proud of my Golem! I spent a long time doing this since fingers are not your best friend!